Welcome to the January Carnival of Natural Parenting: Learning from children
This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama. This month our participants have shared the many lessons their children have taught them. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.
Ben at 22 months old...
As a full-time mummy of a going to be 2 years old in less than 2 months time toddler, I realised that throughout the years of my parenthood journey, I've learned a couple of lessons from my very own child. Yes, from my dear cheeky going to be 2 years old toddling toddler.
OK, enough of Ben's cheekiness for now... Ladies and gentlemen, buckle your seatbelt and follow me through this journey of what I've learned from Benjamin...
#1 : Getting him out (of me) is way easier than raising him up
Although I do get some glory for giving birth to Ben naturally in 4.5 hours time (from 1cm-10cm), I would have to repeat that childbirth is wayyyyyyyyyy easier than taking care and raising your child after you bring him/her into this world.
No matter how painful it might seem at the point of contractions (actually I didn't even realise I started mine until we were at the hospital getting ready to be admitted), no matter how deep and deathly tight your grips were on your dear hubby's hands as each contractions come and go, no matter how you felt like dying as you got ready to take a deep breath and push with all your might hoping it is going to be one to help your baby out, all those pains and tortures seems to vanish the moment your baby was placed with you after the birth.
And then the real journey began... how are we going to raise him up in this world? Are we equipped enough? Are we capable to do so? Are we qualified to be his parent?
|Ben at 5 days old being weighed...
He's so tiny and helpless, can we protect him for as long as we live? Today, everything we are exposed to is full of temptations, influences. How are we going to ensure he knows which is right or wrong? Which is fair and just? Which is good or bad?
And so, we toddle along with Ben as he grows up, hoping we are able to raise and nurture him to be a God fearing, God loving child. A child who does things that pleases Him. A child who brings example of Christian living. A child who brings joy to the lives of people who came into his life. A child who honors, respects and loves his parents.
#2 : Nothing beats the beautiful awesome sight of waking up next to your child
| Ben at 4 days old sleeping next to mummy..
We co-sleep with Ben (still do!) and most of the time, I have the great honor of waking up next to my sleeping child who lies ever so peacefully, without a worry in his mind, without any trouble or sorrow or stress in his head.
Just simply gazing at this awesome work of God is just so fascinating and breathtaking! Not to mention, priceless too!!
#3 : You cannot expect everything to be how you want them to be
|Ben at 3 weeks old...
I have a few of the "What to Expect" books in my bookshelf. But I guess the moment you have your own child, you cannot expect everything to be how you wanted it to be.
Life now revolves around them. Everything must be scheduled around them, before or after their nap time, before or after their feeding time so on and so forth.
No matter how you scheduled and planned everything, you can only hope that everything will turn out all right.
#4 : Take everything with a pinch of salt, live life to the max!
Spilled water, soiled diapers, messy high chairs, unfinished meals, and all sorts of things which can frustrates a parent... all this should not be taken seriously. What I'm trying to say is, there is no need to get frustrated, to get angry or all worked up. Just take things one step at a time and enjoy every moment! This picture below, I will always cherish and remember its moment...
|Ben at 3 months old...
Ben was about 3 months old, happily sitting on my lap when he suddenly jet sprayed his poop which spewed out from the back of his diaper right onto my front... my shorts, my blouse... I was just 2 weeks into being a SAHM, still getting the hang of being a full-time mummy and I was really impressed by my own reactions towards this incident.
Instead of panicking, scolding, screaming or reacting negatively, I called out to my dear hubby to grab the camera and snap the shot. You might think it's gross or crazy for us to react this way, but it's moments like this that will not come by often, so, enjoy it!
Of course, there are lots and lots more lessons I learned from my child, and to think he's not even 2 years old yet!
Personally, I feel that the moment you become a parent, you realised you've got a whole lot more things you never know of and all of a sudden, it's like becoming a child all over again!
With that, I leave you with some inspiring parenting quotes to ponder on:
* It's not only children who grow. Parents do too. As much as we watch to see what our children do with their lives, they are watching us to see what we do with ours. I can't tell my children to reach for the sun. All I can do is reach for it, myself. ~Joyce Maynard
* The trouble with learning to parent on the job is that your child is the teacher. ~Robert Brault
Visit Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting! Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:
- Affection — Alicia at I Found My Feet has finally become a hugger and kisser, now she has someone sweet and small to snuggle with. (@aliciafagan)
- Learning from Daniel — Amy at Anktangle hopes that she and her husband will always be open to learning from their son. (@anktangle)
- Kids Cultivate Awareness of Universal Truths — From forgiveness to joy, Amy Phoenix at Innate Wholeness has become aware of deep truths that come naturally to children. (@InnateWholeness)
- What the Apple Teaches the Tree — Becky at Future Legacy has learned about imagination, forgiveness, and strength.
- A Lesson in Slowing Time — Bethy at Bounce Me To the Moon revels in the chance to just be with her baby.
- Learning From My Children: I Am So Honored — WAHM Chante at My Natural Motherhood Journey is learning to choose tea parties over work. (@MyMotheringPath)
- P-A-T-I-E-N-C-E — Now that she's a mother, Danielle at born.in.japan is finally learning about a personality trait she lacked. (@borninjp)
- Top 5 Homeschool Lessons My Children Taught Me — Deb Chitwood at Living Montessori Now shares what she learned from homeschooling her (now grown) children. (@DebChitwood)
- Learning to Live in the Present By Looking to the Future — Dionna at Code Name: Mama finds the patience to be a gentle parent, because she knows how fleeting childhood really is. (@CodeNameMama)
- The watchful Buddha boy — At Dreaming Aloud, they are learning to cherish their thoughtful, sensitive child in a action-driven, noisy world. (@DreamingAloudNt)
- What My Children Taught Me — Dulce de Leche's children have taught her to value herself for the wonderful person and mother she is.
- Lessons from the First Year — Having a child made Emily at Crunchy(ish) Mama realize that her decisions affect more than just herself. (@CrunchyishMama)
- Lessons from Loss — Erica at ChildOrganics learned so much from the love — and loss — of her sweet Bella, five years ago. (@ChildOrganics)
- The Socratic Baby — Erin at Multiple Musings has so-called "identical" twins to serve as a daily lesson in nature vs. nurture. (@ErinLittle)
- Learning to be a Mother — Farmer's Daughter learned the type of patience that enabled her to calmly eat one-handed for months and change clothes seven times a day, before noon. (@FarmDaughter)
- A Few Things Being a Mom Has Taught Me — Heather at Musing Mommy shares the curious, hilarious, and sometimes Murphy's Law-like tidbits we learn from our children. (@xakana)
- I Feel You — Motherhood has taught Jamey from At the Bee Hive empathy, and it extends beyond just her child. (@JameyBly)
- Lessons From My Child… — Jenny at I'm a full-time mummy shares the inspiring ways she's learned to expect the unexpected — and have a camera ready! (@imaftmummy)
- My child is my mirror — Jessica Claire at Crunchy-Chewy Mama has seen herself in her children – and it's not bad. (@crunchychewy)
- There is enough to go around… — Kellie at Our Mindful Life learned that love doesn't diminish when it's shared.
- Learning From Our Children, Every Day — Kimberly at Homeschooling in Nova Scotia, Canada is continually inspired by her children. (@UsborneBooksCB)
- Life Lessons From My Children — Kristen at Adventures in Mommyhood has learned that every slug is fascinating, doing the dishes is fun, and sharing a banana is a delight. (@crunchymamato2)
- Things I've Learned From My Children — Kristin at Intrepid Murmurings uses pictures to share what she has learned from her children. (@sunfrog)
- Beyond the questions lies the answer — Lauren at Hobo Mama stopped wondering and started knowing — loving and liking our children comes naturally. (@Hobo_Mama)
- Learning from Children — Lily, aka Witch Mom, finds out just how enchanting balloons can be. (@LilyShahar)
- Lifelong Learning — Lindsay at Living in Harmony has learned that what works for one kid might not work for another. (@AttachedMama)
- Walking alongside my daughter — Lindsey at Mama Cum Laude is learning to give the clock less power over her family's life.
- Things my baby taught me about me — Luschka at Diary of a First Child is proud of how she has grown as a mother. (@lvano)
- From my children, I have learned — Mama Mo at Attached at the Nip has a litany of beautiful lessons, from selflessness to sleeplessness.
- The Little Things in Life — In a simple and lovely prose poem, Mandy at Living Peacefully with Children shows how adults worry about the wrong things and forget the little, important ones: watching ladybugs, jumping in leaves, cherishing each moment as it comes.
- The Virtues of Motherhood — Melissa at The New Mommy Files has had opportunities to learn from children as both a teacher and a mother. (@NewMommyFiles)
- My Kids Have Taught Me That It's Time To Stop Blogging — Melodie at Breastfeeding Moms Unite! has learned that childhoods fly by too fast to blog. We'll miss your wonderful online presence, Melodie, and we wish you much peace and happiness. (@bfmom)
- Having Kids Has Taught me a Thing or Two — Michelle at The Parent Vortex learns all day long — from fun facts about hedgehogs to tying a complicated wrap with a screaming child and an audience. (@TheParentVortex)
- We Could All Learn from the Children — Momma Jorje takes time to get on the floor and play so that she can see the world through her child's eyes.
- Teaching Forgiveness — Mrs Green at Little Green Blog has a daughter who's taught her unconditional love — even when she feels like she does't deserve it. (@littlegreenblog)
- Parenting as a joint venture — Olivia at Write About Birth appreciates watching the astonishing way her children learn. (@writeaboutbirth)
- Beginner's Mind — Rachael at The Variegated Life learns from a child who builds bridges to nowhere, calls letter magnets his numbers, and insists dinnertime is truck time. (@RachaelNevins)
- A baby's present — RS at A Haircut and a Shave presents a short poem on the differences between a baby's mindfulness and ours.
- Self-Confidence Was Born With My Daughter — Sara at Halfway Crunchy learned to trust her instincts by responding to her child's needs — and saw her self-confidence bloom.
- The Importance of Being Less Earnest — Seonaid at The Practical Dilettante has one list of earnest and one list of silly things she has learned as a parent. (@seonaid_lee)
- Lessons my children have taught me — Sheryl at Little Snowflakes learned that attachment parenting was the best way to meet the needs of her child and herself. (@Sheryljesin)
- Till the water is clear — Stacy at Mama-Om learns that being present is the best present. (@mama_om)
- I Hold It — Stefanie at Very, Very Fine has learned that the ability to communicate is much more important than the number of words a child knows.
- What My Children Taught Me About Letting Go — Summer at Finding Summer is learning from her kids to laugh in the face of heartache. (@summerminor)
- Finding My Tools — The Artsymama has applied some of what she's learned as a mama in the classroom, with great results!