Seriously...

~ Posted on Thursday, January 13, 2011 at 9:53 AM ~

Seriously folks...

I have no idea how many times I've said this, how many times I've explained this, and yet people still have the perception that just because I'm a SAHM, it means I stay at home all the time, that I get all the rest I can, that I'm the free-est person in the whole wide world, that they can just tell me to help them do things and stuff.

Seriously... I'm tired of all this crap.

I am human. I'm not a super woman.

I do get tired.

I do get sick (though I'd really prefer not to and I thank God my hubby and sometimes MIL helps out to take care of Ben when I'm sick).

I do sometimes wish I could go out and spend some 'me' time.

I do want to eat slowly and enjoy my food like how I used to even though it means I have to eat alone with no company.

People who are single, or are not married, or do not have any children or do not have experience taking care of a child (for at least one whole day), they think I get it very easy in life.

They think that I just sit at home, mop around, play with my boy all day long. ALL DAY LONG.

They think just because they freaking had to go to work and encounter and face clients, users, vendors, bosses etc etc that their life is worse than mine.

Seriously.

When YOU feel sick, you get to apply for leave and rest at home.

But what about me? What do I do when I fell sick? Do I get to apply for leave and rest at home ALL DAY LONG?

Seriously.

When YOU think you're so busy with work, please think that once you go home, your work is over (sorry if you're the type of people who brings work home)

And think that how you look forward to weekend so that you can relax and wind down after a hard week at work.

But what about me? When I'm overwhelmed with taking care of my boy ALL DAY LONG, do I get to go home (oh wait... I AM HOME ALL THE TIME!) and rest?

Do I get to look forward to weekend and all? Everyday is the same thing for us.

Seriously.

Think about what I had to go through before you go and make smart opinions of other people's life.

Especially a stay-at-home mum's life.

(Image taken from Google search)

You have no idea how 'FREE' we are at home 24/7.

You have no idea that even a 10 minutes shower is considered a luxury. (I normally shower with my boy to save time and so I don't have to worry he'll get into any mischief if I bath myself and when I do bath myself, I had to leave the bathroom door open so I can keep an eye on my boy)

You have no idea that even eating alone is a luxury.

You have no idea when you're at your most hungriest and yet you have to feed your child first,  and then have to juggle in watching after him as well when you finally get to eat your portion just so that he doesn't throw or cause a mess at the eating table.

So seriously...

The next time I fall sick, if you are not even caring enough to wish me a 'take care' or a 'get well soon' or 'take a rest' or 'drink more water', please just keep quiet and leave me alone.

I do not need to know your opinion that I have all the time in the world to rest since I'm a stay-at-home mum.

When I'm struggling to conserve my energy so that I really do not fall sick, I do not want to read or hear or know all this  opinions.

I really don't need to hear all this demotivating things at the moment when I should be resting and concentrating on getting well.

So yeah, go away if you've got nothing good to say.

Last birthday with my mum...

~ Posted on Monday, January 3, 2011 at 11:55 PM ~

I woke up this morning and saw my handphone showing a birthday reminder. If my mum is still alive today, she'll be 64 years old on 3rd January.

I still remember 4 years ago, I was at home, alone, praying for things to turn out fine. My mum was in the ICU at that time, her conditons slowly improving - she had kidney failure and was on daily dialysis.

It was just a few minutes after midnight on 3rd January and I decided to risk it (as in get ready to be scolded by the nurses for calling at such late hours). I called up the ICU department and asked the nurse to pass my birthday wish to my mum (she's sleeping that time) when she is awake. When I went to visit my mum later that day, I asked her whether the nurse passed her my birthday wish and she nodded. We didn't celebrate much, no cake, no card, just spending time together.

That would be my last time celebrating birthday with my mum. She passed away 8 days after that. She was and always will be the strongest woman and person I have ever known.

Ma, Happy birthday to you. I missed you so much...

* Image from Google search

What I did in 2010 that I'm proud of...

~ Posted on Saturday, January 1, 2011 at 8:59 AM ~

Oh well... it is now 2011 already! I was just wondering the other day what have I done in 2010 that is worth remembering and be proud of myself other than being a slave full-time mummy to Ben...

#1 : I have finally let go of my previous company - the immediate help and advice and the thoughts of going back there to work.

You see, up until the first quarter of 2010, I was still entertaining thoughts of going back to work and I was still enthusiastically helping out and giving advice to ex-colleagues who asked for my help on the IT system. But now, no more on that. Maybe because I have finally gotten the hang of being a full-time mummy and are not perturbed by the office stuff, politics or etc as much as I did back when I first quit my job.

Of course, I do still care about my ex-colleagues and keep in touch with them via emails or Facebook but I don't feel the thrill of being in a part of the rat race work force anymore. I mean, I used to drop everything on hand (except Ben of course) and cracked my head trying to remember back the IT system stuff just so I could help out my ex-colleagues ASAP. Now, I don't feel like I owe anyone any explanations or anything, if I remember, I will help, else, I'm really sorry. I mean, it has been 1.5 years since I quit my job, so it's really not easy to still remember everything about the system!

# 2 : My very own I'm a full-time mummy domain!

I left my old blog in Blogger and got myself my very own domain! Finally, no more squatting for free on Google and total control of my own posts and blog designs and stuff. Yes, the initial work of redesigning the blog template from scratch, of tweaking and all the countless trials and errors in order to make everything on my blog looks nice (to me!) were such hardwork and stressful (with an active boy to care and watched out at all time), but the end results are worth it!

# 3 : I ventured into BAKING!

I am not much of a cook but venturing into the world of baking is a milestone in my life! I am very happy that I get to experiment and try on some baking recipes, and even contribute some of my baking experience into a few batches of cookies for hubby's clients (as Christmas presents for 2010)

# 4 : I've been able to help some friends, even strangers in the matters of baby care, breastfeeding and so on. Amongst them are advicing:

* 4 mums-to-be on matters pertaining to breastfeeding (why it's good, benefits, how to get more info etc), baby products (essentials, etc)

* 5 new mums on matters pertaining to breastfeeding (latching, co-sleeping, dreamfeeding, EBM storage and disaster plan)

* 4 mums with more than 6 months old child on matters pertaining to breastfeeding, SAHM concerns, baby care, feeding, vaccinations and etc.

I mean, I'm not an expert on parenting, breastfeeding or whatever matters but with the experience I have, I am more than happy to share what I learned, experienced (You only need to ask! I don't want to be a busybody and give advice when you're not asking for it!) and I hope these wonderful people that I came to contact with will value my advice as much as I valued dispensing it to them.

# 5 : Doing more awesome book reviews with more publishing companies!

Just for the year of 2010, I reviewed 20 books of which most are very very good read (no regrets) and some of which are only made possible when I finally gathered my courage to ask for a copy to review. Ask and you shall receive! Amen to that! And for 2011, I currently have 4 e-books on hand (and 2 hardcopies on the way) waiting to be read and reviewed... And to think that we saved so much money and we get to read and review all those books for free! God is so awesome and generous!

# 6 : Doing awesome music album reviews!

Yes, I reviewed 6 music albums for 2010! It all started with some browsing over the Internet and I stumbled upon this website which has a link for blogger review program and I just signed up for it. Weeks later, I got an email with details to review my fist ever music album which was published in July 2010. From then on, other opportunities came by and there were from different PR companies (I still have no idea how they got my contact since I only signed up for one!)

So, that was it for now that I can think of. All in all, it was a fruitful and blessed year for me, for us in fact to live through 2010 (good health, good income, abundant joys, happy family and good memories to cherish, made more bloggy friends). And not to forget, the ability to still breastfeed Ben who is going to be 22 months old in a few days time (still zero speck of formula powder in the house woohooo!)

I am for ever thankful to God for His neverending blessings and generosity to us and I hope that with this new year which has ushered in, we will get to enjoy and be blessed with more of this awesome stuff!

I hope that you will have a blessed year ahead too! And a big thanks to my regular blog and/or Facebook followers for your neverending comment support and encouragement!

* Images are all taken from Google image search